AHEM!!! People, calm down, please! We have a new member in our midst and we should welcome her as we do with all our new members. Oh, wait. We don't.
Anyhoof, I have an important announcement to make: I DO COCAINE! But don't tell nobody, OK?
Another equally important matter is that we have a certain member, who's not
, but who has been keeping secrets from us. That's not nice. Dude, it's time to come clean.
Finally, I reach the news I dread to speak of: a war has started, a war between the Dark Lord himself
and me
, a war fought by ghouls, ghosts, wraiths, spiders and heartless fallen knights lead by the Dark Lord against my army of ponies. I fear this war will consume us all, already most of the eastern fields and filled with countless bodies from both sides. The rivers run red with blood and the air reeks of death. Though the situation may seem grim and the battles long and horrible I am willing to sacrifice wave after wave of my own ponies to see that the Dark Lord does not achieve victory.